Hanging on a Wire
by FalloutGamerGal
Summary: MacCready and the Sole Survivor have a heart-to-heart which leads Valkyrie to a conclusion that she's been trying to deny all along: she loved him. Still mourning Nate, can she find it in herself to move on, get past her own insecurities and find some bit of happiness in this dark new world with her best friend? Will eventually tread the Institute and Railroad main quests.
1. Hanging on a Wire

The glaring arena lights of Diamond City greeted Valkyrie and MacCready as they stepped out of the mayors office and onto the waiting lift. Valkyrie was feeling giddy, as she twirled the keys of her newly purchased house in her hand. She looked over to MacCready and although he previously disagreed with her decision to purchase the house he appeared to be feeling just as excited as she did over the new addition; if that rare smirk on his face was anything to go by.

They shut the gate behind them and MacCready wordlessly started the contraption. As the lift began it's descent Valkyrie leaned her elbows on the railing and overlooked the vast expanse of the silent city below. The lights before them, so bright, cast an incredible contrast to their surroundings. Her eyes turned over again to MacCready, the floodlights giving him a light and dark side.

The pair had recently finished delivering medicine to save Duncan's life, and due to him feeling noticeably homesick and her desire to feel more grounded she settled on the idea of purchasing a new house. Maybe... it might do the two of them some good. To take a much needed break from the vagabond lifestyle.

It wasn't long before MacCready caught her gaze, "What?"

She smiled, "Nothing just... the lights are really bright up here."

He rolled his eyes at that, "Yeah, you would think that they-"

The lift beneath them suddenly groaned and quivered. Before either of them could react the lift lurched, violently throwing them to their feet before it slammed to a halt.

Uninjured, Valkyrie gazed down through the floor she was laying on to see that they were still at least fifty feet above ground. And last she checked, the city didn't necessarily have mechanics on call. There was no telling how long they would be suspended in the air.

Though if she were to imagine the lift _should_ be repaired by morning. The mayor would be very upset to awaken to this, and she knew how the local security idolized the man.

"Jesus, are you alright?" MacCready asked, his face close and full of concern.

She gave him a reassuring nod, "I'm fine," and looked him over, "You?"

"Fine," he said, sounding relieved. MacCready began to push himself upright. "Sometimes I'm not sure which city is the bigger dump; Goodneighbor or Diamond City. They're nearly tied on everything except the crime rate."

She couldn't agree more. Diamond City didn't resemble a diamond at all, and Good Neighbor was full of people that were anything but neighborly.

Valkyrie sat herself up and leaned back against a panel. She blew air noisily out of her mouth. _Well, there goes the notion of sleeping in a bed tonight._

She sighed, her good mood gone, "Dammit."

There was a sudden eruption of laughter which caused Valkyrie to look up incredulously at it's source.

"Haha, I told you laying down caps on that house was a decision we'd regret."

She raised a scarred eyebrow at him, "And who said I regret it?"

He smiled and shook his head, "Ooh you will. Especially if it starts to rain."

Feeling dread creep in Valkyrie turned to the sky. Sure enough, it was cloudy. It would be just like MacCready to jinx them, again.

"Next I suppose you'll say 'things couldn't get any worse'," she mocked his tone.

"Well, actually..."

She gave him a playful kick with her boot and he chuckled, taking the beating he rightfully deserved good-naturedly. As he usually does.

She looked back down again. The town was mostly vacant this time of night - save for the guards, which there were three currently staring up at them with rather clueless expressions.

"Well, I guess we're gonna be up here awhile..." MacCready drawled on ominously.

"Mhmm," was all she managed to respond. Her thoughts began to drift elsewhere. To a place more civilized and seriously less gory.

"Do you know what this reminds me of?" She asked, her previous disappointment fading with every second.

"What? Getting stuck in a lift? Don't tell me this has happened to you before," he said, a little bemused.

She gave a small laugh, "No no. Back before the bombs there were places you could go to ride amusement rides." She smiled slightly in remembrance before continuing, "There was this one I loved called the ferris-wheel. It was sorta like a... giant tire rim, with seats suspended along its edges." Valkyrie brought up her hands to demonstrate, "It would take you up and down in a circle, but it had to stop frequently, to load and unload all of its carts. It was fun, because you could sit with someone you cared about," she gave him a sideways glance, "and just enjoy a moment alone together. Where no one would catch you two-" she stopped herself short as a load of memories came flooding in.

She saw in her mind's eye a younger version of herself and Nate. Just a couple of hormonally charged kids that were full of themselves and preoccupied with breaking their curfews. The biggest concern waging on their young minds revolved around the now trivial matter of what they were going to tell their parents later that night.

It seemed so long ago. That moment - that _world_. Everyday, more and more it feels like it was nothing but a pleasant dream.

She brought herself back to the present and saw that MacCready was tentatively watching her... analyzing her.

She hurriedly continued, albeit a little more self conscious than before, "And when the ride stopped-well, it felt kinda like this." She paused and shifted her gaze again to the glaring lights of Diamond City. "Just like this... only there was a lot more noise and far more pleasant smells," she finished with an unruly smile.

MacCready took a moment to soak in the information before a mischievous look had taken hold of his eyes. "So... is that your roundabout way of saying you _care_ about me?" he asked, his tone teasing.

If she hadn't known better she might think he was flirting. Which she knew that wasn't case, for many reasons. Namely because her face is too marred to warrant that kind of mild affection now - from anybody.

Still, she felt her stomach tighten at the notion. From guilt and something else. The same something else she had been fighting internally for weeks now.

She laughed to brush away these thoughts.

"MacCready, if I didn't care about you then I wouldn't put up with all the bad luck you bring on us."

The look that came upon his face suggested that he had almost been offended.

"Now wait a minute," he started, trying to repress a knowing smirk, "I call it out like it is. Just because I say something bad is gonna happen and then it does doesn't make it my fault."

"Really? When was the last time something bad happened that you didn't predict would happen beforehand? Face it, MacCready, you're a jinx!"

He looked a little less amused now. "C'mon, you know you ran into trouble before I got here."

"Like when?" She challenged. Her record was actually pretty stellar.

"Well, like with that gren-" he managed to catch himself before he could finish, but not before she figured out what he was alluding to.

She knew what he was fixing to say. Grenade. The same grenade that burned up the right side of her face during that first encounter with Super Mutants. This was well before MacCready joined her crew, when she still wore her vault jumpsuit and carried an unmodified weapon around. Even though she knew it shouldn't, the memory still bothered her. And not because it was a horrifying experience, but because it was then she lost her physical appeal. And with that came the loss of admiring glances, and brought on the birth of double takes and that apologetic look people got in their eyes during conversations.

MacCready's voice was full of remorse, "I-I'm sorry, I-"

"It's fine." And it was, she knew he hadn't mean to hurt her.

"I mean it, it just slipped and-"

"Don't worry about it, MacCready," she gave him a smile, though it didn't quite reach her eyes. "We're cool, aight?"

"I..."

She gave him the look. The 'I'm the boss of this here outfit and my word is final' look. It usually worked to silence him. "Okay?"

And it did.

He let out a long sigh, defeated. "You let me off too easy... I'll make it up to you later. Assuming you don't decide dump me out on the streets after the lift starts working again."

She smiled, "Tempting, but no. I couldn't do that to you, MacCready. I have too much invested in you."

"Haha, I see what you did there."

She smiled wider.

MacCready studied her expression for a moment. "Actually... do you remember earlier? When I said I needed to tell you something?"

How could she forget? He threw an absolute tantrum when she told him it had to wait. "Yes, MacCready, I remember. You think now is the time?"

He chuckled, "If I keep waiting we may never get around to it, and this is as good a time as any."

Valkyrie brought her knees up to her chest. The draft finally getting to her. "Continue."

"Appreciated," he said, as he scooted a bit closer to her. "How to begin? Well, after helping me get Duncan's cure from Med-Tek, I figured I owed you something... and I always pay my debts." He said with a determined face as his hand reached for his pocket.

She was about to object when, to her surprise, he pulled out a little wooden man.

"I know a carved toy soldier is a strange reward for putting up with me but this one's special... it means a lot to me."

Valkyrie was still too shocked to protest as he handed her the little figurine. "Umm... thank you?"

He smiled, "You're welcome."

She fiddled with the little soldier in her hands. The wooden guy was decked out in green and holding a miniature rifle at rest. It felt so smooth, and even though his paint was faded from wear it was still incredibly clean. MacCready had given the toy a lot of care.

She decided to guess, "Is this a souvenir from that kids place you grew up at?"

He took a deep breath, "No, my wife Lucy gave this to me right after we met. I uh... I told her I was a soldier and she made it for me."

Valkyrie kept her eyes fixed on the toy to mask her surprise. _His wife made this?_

MacCready's next line was uttered in a barely audible whisper, "I never could bring myself to tell her the truth... that I was just a hired killer."

Valkyrie traced the outlines of the little toy as she digested this, unsure how she felt. She never would have made him out to be the deceitful kind.

"Did she ever... find out?" Valkyrie asked, her voice cautiously low.

"No. And I couldn't tell it to her now anyway... she died a few years back."

Valkyrie's eyes tightened with regret. _Why did she always have to ask the stupid questions?_

He went on, "We made the mistake of holing up in a metro station one night, and we didn't know the place was infested with ferals." His voice dropped an octave, "They were on her before I could even fire a shot. Ripped her apart right in front of me... it took everything I had to escape with Duncan in my arms..."

He looked down at his hands and continued softly, "Sometimes I look back and wonder if it would have been better if we'd simply died right there with her..."

Valkyrie felt a surprising jolt of pain shoot through her body. He could have never wanted that... could he?

She searched his face, her vision blurring with emotion, "What about your son?" _What about me?_ "What about Lucy? Do you think they would have wanted the same thing? Don't you think Lucy would have wanted you to carry on without her?"

An odd sense of deja vu came over Valkyrie as she said this. Wasn't this the same conundrum she faced with Nate? What would he have wanted? Perhaps she had just answered her own question.

He sighed, "I suppose you're right, heck I don't even know anymore."

He leaned his head back against the panel and closed his eyes, "Damn I miss Lucy."

Valkyrie gaped at him, he had never let himself finish swearing before.

"See, no matter how bad things got she was always there with a shoulder to lean on. It gave me the courage I needed to press ahead. To never give up. And when she died, I thought that feeling was gone forever." He then opened his eyes and looked to his companion in earnest, "Then, well I met you. You have all the world's problems on your back and here you are helping me with mine... lending me your shoulder like Lucy did."

Valkyrie, much to her dismay, felt an unbidden warmth blossom in her chest.

"I just want you to know how much your friendship means to me."

"By giving me a toy?" She asked, feeling giddy again.

"Well, yes."

Valkyrie stared into his impossibly warm eyes and felt those suppressed feelings surface again. Was there a chance that the two of them could be more? Did she even want that? Valkyrie wasn't quite ready to explore that possibility yet honestly. Still... she couldn't help but wonder.

 _Why did you compare me to your wife MacCready? Do you... see our relationship as something more? And why do you always tease? Was it possible..._

No. There was no way that it could be possible. But try as she might, Valkyrie couldn't reign in her thoughts.

As she continued to gaze in his eyes she found herself mumbling, "Could we ever be more than friends, MacCready?" She flinched, realizing with horror that she had just said that out loud.

The surprise statement caught her employee completely off guard.

MacCready's eyes nearly bulged out of his head, "I-I don't know - I mean - I never thought about us like that."

She flinched, again. Never. He never thought about them like that. Not even once.

That...

 _ **Hurt**_

She knew the scars on her face were pretty gruesome, but hearing that he, a single man never thought of her - the only female around for miles at a time - as something other than a friend wounded much more than her pride.

She had to finally admit it to herself. She _liked_ him. Much more than she ever wanted to.

MacCready was still floundering, "What about your husband? I know he's gone but you still love him, don't you?" It didn't really sound like a question, more like he desired confirmation to the assumptions he'd already made.

She looked at his uncomfortable expression hopelessly. He didn't want her as anything more than a friend, in fact he probably still missed his Lucy like she missed her Nate. All the teasing they've been doing was just part of their personal jargon, but somewhere along the line she forgot that part and now she was paying for it. It was only her stupid imagination which led her to believe that he might have thought of her as something else.

This revelation snuffed out some small flicker of hope she didn't know she had been bearing. They were only going to be friends, nothing more.

Agh, she _knew_ better than this. How could she have let this happen?

MacCready's lost expression brought her out of her thoughts. She needed to give him an answer and she decided to give him the one he wanted to hear. And though she could stop the tears from escaping her flooded eyes, she couldn't do the same with her voice. "You're right, I still miss him. I... I don't know what I was thinking."

And just like that, their romance was over before it even began.

He seemed alarmed by her tone, "Hey," he elbowed her glum form gently, "It's alright. Trust me, I know exactly how you're feeling right now."

 _No you don't_ she thought. Still, she appreciated the sentiment.

Emotionally spent she leaned into his side for support, a desire to rest her head on his shoulder bubbling to the surface but Valkyrie didn't dare. She wasn't going to risk alienating her closest friend in this world for some extra human comfort.

"I want to thank you for hearing me out," he started, trying to cheer her up, "Taking all that weight from my shoulders will make the journey a little easier, if you know what I mean?" He offered with a smile.

She simply nodded. "I know, I feel heavier already."

He chuckled.

She sat there quietly for a moment when a horrible thought came to her, "When we get off this lift you're not going to dump _me_ out on the streets now are you?" She asked, slightly worried that her stupid shenanigans might be the straw that broke the camel's back.

He dully shook his head, "Wouldn't dream of it."

They sat there like that in another moment of silence. Just two comrades waiting for the metaphorical smoke to clear, when a sudden crack of thunder brought them both out of their personal reveries.

She sighed, "Dammit, MacCready." She looked worriedly to the ground, the guards had someone working on the call elevator console - how that was gonna help them she didn't have a clue.

"I swear it isn't a jinx, I just have a-"

She shook her head, "Never mind." She stood up and looked around frantically. It took her a minute but an idea eventually came to her.

"Maybe... we can use our clothes to make rope so we can climb down." She looked to MacCready, all business, "Hand me your coat."

"We haven't reached that point _yet,_ " he argued.

Before she could counter him the lift let out a long metallic groan. After a moments hesitation the contraption began to hum happily and continue its previous descent. Cheers could be heard from the men below.

MacCready let out a sigh, "Finally."

She grinned at him, "Relieved?

His lips twitched. "You could say that."

She humorously shook her head and looked towards the nearing ground. MacCready was far too partial with his clothes.

Valkyrie was about to reach for the railing when she noticed one of her hands felt heavy. Her eyes gently turned to her clenched fist. She had forgotten all about the mini MacCready replica that was now in her possession.

Another boom of thunder let everyone know that rain was nearly imminent. Valkyrie quickly tucked the toy away in one of her trouser pockets to keep it hidden from the elements. She noted that MacCready was watching her actions but she pretended not to notice. It was a habit she'd formed out of necessity because, well, he watched her quite often.

The lift made landfall and the pair filed out quickly. The guards gave their apologies and of course asked about her and MacCready's well-being but after a few quick answers they let them go on their way. The guards were all too eager to end their already extended shifts.

As the two headed in the direction of her newly purchased home, Valkyrie's thoughts drifted towards what the future might have in store. Her heart felt a little heavier knowing that a few contingencies her mind had toyed with before were no longer viable. But not all was lost, at least MacCready was still sticking around. That's more than what could be said for poor Nate.

 _Nate._

Valkyrie was about to let the memory of her late husband bog her down again when low and behold - it began to rain.

"Son-of-a..."

"Bitch?" She quipped, thankful for the distraction he'd always been so good at providing.

He simply shook his head. "I swear, you curse nearly as bad as I use to. If Lucy-" he stopped himself short as pain flittered across his face.

Despite what transpired earlier, despite the fact that she knew she shouldn't, her heart swelled for him - with more than just sympathy.

Looking back, Valkyrie could see what she had been missing in her assessment before. A simple fact that was so blindingly obvious only someone as self centered as her could miss it. He was still Lucy's. And that wasn't going to change any time soon.

 _Well, maybe not all Lucy's_ she thought as MacCready quickly recovered and picked a path out of the rain. She now had her own personal piece of MacCready in her pocket, and she wasn't about to let it go.

* * *

 **Author's Note:** _This is my first attempt at writing fanfiction so I would greatly appreciate any advice or criticism you'd be willing to impart on me. Thanks for reading!  
_


	2. One for the Lovelorn

**Author's Note** : _So... due to positive feedback I'm going to try and expand this. Keep in mind, I had originally intended Hanging on a Wire to be a one-shot so the change may be a little teeny tiny bit awkward. Hopefully that will pass as I find a flow and rhythm to this._

* * *

Valkyrie was alone and sore when she awoke.

She should've known - expected, that even in this post apocalyptic world a new house would be entirely barren. She had hoped that the previous owners would have left their dingy mattresses behind, but apparently that wasn't the case. She and MacCready had both slept on the floor last night, in separate areas of course. The place was pretty spacious so there was no excuse for them to sleep in each others presence. And much to her chagrin Valkyrie regretted that. She had been unpleasantly surprised at how hard it had been to fall unconscious without the sound of MacCready's light snoring to lull her to sleep.

While fighting insomnia in the dark hours of the morning Valkyrie had heard MacCready's footfalls pass through the threshold to Diamond City. Valkyrie didn't know where he went off to, all she knew was that he had yet to return.

Hopefully he hadn't decided to desert her after all.

She grouchily forced herself to get up. It was more likely that he went to get some supplies or maybe visit Barkov. Ever since MacCready paid her back the money for hiring him she has made sure to evenly split the spoils - though he seemed more than content with letting her be the bank. And with that in mind she could rest assured knowing that he wouldn't go far with her holding most of the dough.

Her sudden lack of faith in MacCready would have bothered her not long ago but after last night... she still couldn't figure out why he stuck around. She doesn't necessarily pay him, and they were good friends certainly but... didn't he have something better to do than watch her sorry hide all day?

 _Maybe that was it_ , she thought as she slowly righted herself, _he simply didn't have anything better to do_. She could internally debate over the issue later, her priority now was to obtain some mattresses. Said soft cushions may not have made last night perfect, but they sure as hell would have helped.

She rubbed her aching neck and headed downstairs, mumbling a steady stream of curses at the many trivial sins the wasteland committed daily when she suddenly caught sight of MacCready sitting at a makeshift table, noodles in hand. He motioned one bowl to her and Valkyrie found herself smiling, remembering MacCready's awkward one-sided conversation with the foreign robot that she had witnessed.

As she looked on she also noted two sleeping bags lying at his feet. MacCready was on a roll today.

Valkyrie lightly skipped her way to the table, idly wondering how he snuck back in so quietly. MacCready watched her antics with humor. The awkward conversation they had yesterday seemingly swept under the rug. They were back to being partners again.

Now Valkyrie _loathed_ pre-war noodles but she took them anyway and sat herself down, not wanting to offend the man that had been considerate enough to get them for her in the first place.

"You seem to be in a good mood this morning," he mindfully observed.

 _Yeah, now that you're here_ , she thought solemnly. Thankful the mouthful of noodles prevented her from saying THAT out loud. "Seeing those sleeping bags has dramatically improved my mood," she said after swallowing, "Where'd you get em' from anyway?"

"Myrna."

She dully nodded, trying to finish her food as quickly as possible while mentally grasping at straws, attempting to plan out their day.

"Did you happen to get ammo?" She asked, hoping for something to do.

"Yep, done and done."

Their eyes made contact for a brief moment before Valkyrie could no longer repress a snicker.

"Jeez, MacCready. Since when did you gain such initiative?"

"Since I finally had the opportunity - not that I'm complaining or anything..." he amended quietly.

Well that sure sounded like a complaint. Valkyrie gave him a sideways glance but decided to let it go. If MacCready had any grievances that needed to be addressed he would air them, as he had done so many times before.

They continued to eat the rest of their noodles in silence. Once Valkyrie was done she set her bowl on the table, taking note that this place was still lacking a sink. Another thing to add to her list.

"So," MacCready started, casually while mimicking her action, "What's our next job?"

Valkyrie regarded him with mock disbelief. "Seriously, MacCready? We've been stationary for less than a day and you're all ready to hit the road again?"

He delivered an exaggerated sigh and rolled his eyes, "I'm just asking so I can plan ahead."

Valkyrie dipped her head in acknowledgement as she tried to repress a growing smirk. She enjoyed pushing his buttons. She couldn't help it really, he was so much fun to mess with.

Valkyrie began to lightly tap her fingers against the provisional table as she contemplated an answer to his question. Truthfully, she hadn't given the issue much thought. They had finished pretty much every and any merc job within the vicinity over the past few months. They could go exploring again now that they can finally afford it, as it provided her with one of the very few enjoyable outlets that she could find in this new, tarnished world she found herself living in.

"Honestly... I haven't decided yet," Valkyrie said after about a minute of silence. "I have been toying with this one idea though..." she paused, eyeing him. She usually preferred to keep the jobs a secret until they arrived on location. She, perhaps too thoroughly, enjoyed having that leverage in their partnership.

MacCready donned on a look of confidence as he gently set an elbow on the table and placed his chin against a fisted palm, simultaneously giving her his infamous puppy eyes.

"And that is...?"

Against her will Valkyrie's eyes softened, relenting, as she was unable to resist the secret weapon that had gotten him his way so many times.

She smiled sadly at this revelation. What transpired the night before springing itself back into her mind. "Ever been to the Combat Zone?"

* * *

 _ **Author's Note:** Aaaand this sucks. I have two other (unfinished) versions of this chapter; both a bit darker but also not cooperating with me and so, since I had this one finished already, I posted it. If things go to plan I will be replacing this one in the future at some point - I just really wanted to get the story rolling._


End file.
